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Monday, March 16, 2009
Raha toa ianao ka … hiady, aza mitsapa ny herinao izany
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Hoy ny taim-bavan’i Nedala hoe : Alohan’ny hiantsiana ady, fantaro aloha ny herinao. Indrisy fa ankehitriny dia toa miverina aminy io teny io. Saingy, raha ny fahitako azy kosa dia izao no fahendrena tokony horaisina: Alohan’ny hamakiana ady, fantaro aloha ny herin’ny fahavalonao sy ny fahalemenao.
Avant de partir en guerre, évalue la force de ton adversaire et aussi tes faiblesses.
1) Fantaro aloha hoe iza no fahavalonao.
Mialoha ny zavatra rehetra, fantaro aloha hoe iza no fahavalonao. Raha Andry Rajoelina, fatina DJ kely tsy misy traikefa no noeritreretin’Andriamatoa Ravalomanana ho fahavalony dia diso amin’ny katesizy ny lehilahy. Amin’izao andro anoratana izao dia hitany tsara hoe iza no tena namany ary iza avy kosa no fahavalony. Raha tsy isaina aloha ny vahoaka Malagasy fa ireo olo-manan-kaja fotsiny dia tratry ny be noho vitsy izy. Indrisy. Ny eto an-toerana fotsiny izay. Ny momba ny fahavalony avy any ivelany, izay iaraha-mahalala hoe iza manginy fotsiny.
2) Fantaro ny herin’ny fahavalonao.
Rehefa hita sy voafaritra tsara hoe iretsy no fahavaloko sy mety ho fahavaloko, dia mila tombanana tsara ny hery ananan’izy ireo, ary tombanana hoe toy ny inona rehefa mitambatra. Ity tolona ity dia nahitana fa kely vovok’aina ilay TGV, mahery am-boalohany fa mora sempotra, ka voatery nitady fanampiana tamin’izay ankolafin-kery rehetra nanaiky hijapy lamasinina.
3) Fantaro ny fahalemenao.
Tsy ny herinao akory no inona amin’ny ady, fa na mahery toa inona aza ianao ka sendra ny mahay angaredona na ny manam-paharetana, mety ho reraka ihany koa na ho tratry ny tsy ampoizina. Ny fahalemen’ny tena no mila fantarina fa io no ahafahan’ny fahavalo mandresy ny tena.
Raha hiverina amin’ilay hoe fantaro ny fahavalonao aho, dia anisan’ny voalohany amin’ny fahavalon-dRavalomanana dia izy tenany ihany sy ny avonavom-pony. Fahalemena lehibe ho azy ny tsy fananany sofina afaka hihaino ny hafa fa ny azy ihany, … izany hoe mihaino ihany ny lehilahy fa misy fahatarana (retard de phase) foana. Ny fahalemeny faharoa dia ny tsy nahavitany ny mission nampanana ny tsy manana nefa tsy maka amin’ny manana, fa toa vao mainka ny nifanohitra tamin’izay aza no tsapan’ny olona sasany, hany ka raha vao nahita mpanohitra tsy isan’ny goaika antitra ny vahoaka dia nirohotra nanohana.
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Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Et si … l’erreur fatale du PDS Guy Rivo Randrianarisoa
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Anarina foana fa … eeeeeeeeeeee
Mardi 10 mars 2009, anniversaire de ma maman, joyeux anniversaire maman.
Journée noire pour le PDS nommé par le pouvoir Ravalomanana à la tête de la mairie de la commune urbaine d’Antananarivo : On saccage sa maison puis on y met le feu.
Tenenina foana fa … eeeeeeeeeeee
Je vais vous raconter sa mésaventure. Tout a commencé le matin, Guy Rivo ne s’est pas réveillé tôt. Et pourtant, il a un avion à prendre l’après-midi, et des tas d’autres obligations le matin. Il a exactement dix-sept minutes et soixante-dix sept secondes pour faire sa toilette, réchauffer la voiture et partir. Il s’est lavé le visage, les aisselles, les mains et les pieds. Le p’tit déj, il le prendra dans sa voiture.
Il fait sa toilette très vite, et devinez-quoi? Seize minutes et huit secondes se sont déjà écoulées. Il a donc une minute et soixante-neuf secondes pour se raser, s’habiller et partir. Il se touche le menton et la bouche puis se dit: Je ne me raserai pas ce matin, il y a quelques poils mais c’est pas bien grave.
Dans mon billet mêmes causes, mêmes effets en langue malgache, j’ai expliqué qu’en cas d’émeute populaire, on se prend toujours à la propriété d’un homme politique chauve et barbu, on le saccage et on brûle sa maison. Le cas s’est présenté en 2002 et un autre Guy: Razanamasy en paya le prix de sa tête chauve et de ses barbes. En 2009, c’est le tour de Moxe Ramandimbilahatra, toujours chauve et barbu.
Et le 10 mars, ayant commis l’irréparable d’avoir volontairement oublié de se raser le matin, c’est Guy Rivo qui est victime du saccage et brûlage de maison, vu qu’il est déjà un peu chauve et qu’il a laissé quelques barbes sur son visage.
FIN de l’histoire, juste un dernier PS.
Au cas où vous avez remarqué qu’une minute c’est soixante secondes, ne cherchez pas à comprendre… Ce charabia est mis pour essayer désespérément de mettre une touche d’humour dans une histoire à la Gore, sans trop se montrer sadique
Friday, March 6, 2009
Raha toa moa ka … kely, fohy, raims fa milay
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Teny roa fotsiny.
Nisy fety tao amin’ilay orinasa niasako. Efa vonona ny kaly sy tsaky isan-karazany, samy haka izay laniny rehefa avy eo fa alohan’ny hihinanana dia misy kabary betsaka aloha. Vita ny kabary, somary elaela ihany, ny olona efa ramaka, nefa mbola tsy tonga dia hihinana fa ny “section théatre” ao amin’ilay orinasa hono mbola hampiseho talenta hamalifaly ny mpiara-miasa aloha. Vetivety fotsiny.
Tsy nahitako finy (vakio hoe fìhany) ilay teatra fa ratsy ny fanamafisam-peo. Miandry izay hihafarany fotsiny aho dia hitehaka, hanome courage. Afaka 4 minitra, indreny fa niara-niondrika ry zareo, nirefodrefotra ny tehaka. Hay mbola tsy vita fa ny fizarana voalohany no vao vita, ka tsy namonjy nidina tety aminay mpijery fa mbola samy niverina teo an-tsehatra ireo mpilalao. Dia nitohy indray ny teatra. 4 minitra indray, saingy sahala amin’ny hoe naharitra kokoa noho ny teo. Ireny indray fa niondrika, nirefodrefotra mafimafy kokoa ny tehaka eran’ny trano. Ilay tehaka mafy tsy midika hoe faly ny mpijery tamin’ilay prestation fa hafaliana hoe hikaly amin’izay. Kanjo indrisy, mbola vao fizarana faharoa no vita fa indreny ny mpilalao mbola niverina toy ny teo ihany. Kiii. Fa misy fizaràna firy aza ity kisehoseho ity?
Tsy voaisako fa angamba teo amin’ny 4 na 5 teo ny fizaràna. Ny tadidiko dia nihamora ny hamafin’ny tehaka, ramaka sa leo? Tsapako koa fa hay tsy izahay taty afara irery no tsy nahazo izay havia sy havanana amin’ilay teatra fa na ny tany aloha koa aza. Raha tsorina dia ry zareo mpilalao ihany no mety nahazo finy raha nisy finy izay seho izay.
Nony tena vita ilay teatra dia indreny fa nidina amin’izay ireo mpilalao nankety aminay mpijery. Nirefodrefotra sady naharitra mihitsy ny tehaka teo, tehaka mihatsaravelatsihy ranofotsiny. Faly ny rehetra fa vita ihany ilay kalvary nampiaretana azy. Nony nangingìna ny tehaka dia nihiaka mafy tao anatin’ny mpiara-miasa tao aho, arak’izay tratrako amin’ity feo keliko.
Teny roa fotsiny.
“Bis eeeeeeee!”
Saingy anisan’ny hatsikana noforoniko tiako indrindra iny. Kely, fohy, raims fa … milay izy amiko. Mahafaly ny mpanao hatsikana ny mahita ny “assistance” miredona hehy mandre izay inianao atao mba hampihomehy, fa mainka milay koa ny mahita ireo izay tsy mahazo raha ka mitodika manao masiaka be mijery ho iza koa ilay niteny hoe Bis teo…