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Monday, July 11, 2011
Et si … blague et leçon
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L’histoire se passe dans un bar. Un mec se lève et se dirige vers le barman, il commande une bière et la déguste sur place, au lieu de l’apporter vers son copain avec qui il a discuté et partagé une table. Puis, il s’adresse au barman.
- On m’appelle le roi de la pisse, dit-il. Je te parie que si je pose cette verre sur ce bar, et si je me tiens débout depuis là où mon copain s’assoit, je peux pisser en visant ce verre, et je ne verserai aucune goutte d’urine en dehors de ce verre, et que je peux remplir ce verre à moitié avec mon urine.
- Pari tenu, répond le barman en souriant, 2.000 dollars que tu ne réussiras pas. Sur ce, le barman compte 20 billets de 100 dollars et le pose sur la table.
- Ca me va, dit le client, et il met également 2.000 dollars avec les billets du barman.
Il recule, sort son engin, vise le verre, regarde son pénis, vise le verre, regarde son pénis et pchhhhhhhtttt. Il déverse son urine partout dans le bar, sauf dans le verre. Il arrive même à en mettre quelques gouttes sur la blouse du barman.
Il remet l’engin dans sa braguette et s’approche du barman et disant : Oops, on dirait que j’ai perdu. Mais sur ce, il reçoit un uppercut direct du barman qui l’envoie voler et tomber par terre, le barman l’essuie encore de coups de pieds, tout en grommelant des gros mots et avec l’air furax.
- Pourquoi est-tu si fâché, balbutie-il au barman, tu viens de gagner mes 2.000 dollars.
- J’ai bien le droit de gagner 2.000 dollars et être fâché quand-même non? Au fait, c’est le règlement de la maison en ce qui concerne les gens impropres: le barman les roue de coups et ensuite, ils doivent nettoyer leurs saletés, tu aurais dû être au courant, c’est écrit dans les contrats d’utilisation de mon bar.
Comme vous l’aviez deviné, le gars avait fait un pari de 5.000 dollars avec son ami, comme quoi il arriverait à pisser dans le bar, n’importe où, même sur le barman sans que celui-ci s’emporte, et qu’il s’en tirerait sans problème. Il a perdu là aussi, semble-t-il.
Morales de l’histoire : 1) Vous n’êtes pas le seul à avoir vu le film Desperado avec Antonio Banderas, et 2) Il faut toujours lire attentivement les règlements, contrats et termes d’utilisations quoi que vous fassiez. (La deuxième leçon est valable même pour vous inscrire à des sites comme Facebook ou pour installer des logiciels.)