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Wednesday, February 24, 2010
What if … @tohappen
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Rehefa vaovao hono ny taona dia manao an’izany hoe résolutions ny olona? Ho an’ny langage geek dia izany angaha no atao hoe @todo? Misy koa anefa ny firariantsoa ifanaovana. Izany angaha no atao hoe wishlist?
Ilay @todo fotsiny aloha tsy tiako hatao satria mana-oainina rehefa @ faran’ny taona hoe tsy nisy vita akory ny antsasak’ilay izy. Raha wishlist ranoray fotsiny indray dia toa hijanona ho revin-gadra be, na koa resaka manidina sy safobemantsina fotsiny (toy ny hoe hitondra soa sy fanambinana anie ity taona vaovao ity).
Ny sosokevitro izany dia karazana fitambaran’ireo @todo sy wishlists ireo. Misy ny azo hotanterahina tsara, misy ny tsy miankina velively amin’ny tenako, misy ny revin-gadra, misy ny tena azo atao na izao dia izao aza. Anisan’ny mampiavaka ity lisitro ity koa dia tsy izay tena heverina ho mavesa-danja indrindra amin’ny fiainana sy faniriana no hotantaraina fa misy ny mety hoeritreretinao hoe resa-jaza be.
Ity ary ilay lisitra e, tsy ferana ho amin’ity taona 2010 ity koa ny hahatanterahany, kanefa hojerena ihany amin’ny faran’ny taona hoe iza avy no tanteraka.
Mihidy maizina be ao anaty efitra iray ao an-trano, mipetraka eo ambony seza misy apaonsa tsara dia mianoka mihaino ireto hira ireto : Hotel California (Eagles), Tajabone (Ismael Lo), Sultan of Swing (Dire Straits), Why worry (Dire Straits).
S’offrir ou offrir un cadeau électronique.
Voir en direct l’équipe nationale senior de football de Madagascar à la télévision remporter un match en phase finale d’une compétition continentale ou mondiale.
Discuter (IRL please) avec simplex autour de quelques verres de THB et parler de la supériorité masculine, d’homosexualité féminine, de christiannisme et des fozaorana.
Manao am-paritra (mihinana tsy mizara) boatina Pringles 2 GM.
Mikarakara ny mpanofa trano rehetra, na ny ambany rihana na ny ambony rihana. (Mila amin’ity 2010 ity io tanjona iray io fa raha tsy vita amin’ity ho ampijalian’ny areti-nify amin’ny herintaona).
Mametraka anaty DVD ireo sarimihetsika nalaina izay mameno ny disque dur hatramin’izao.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Et si … toujours vouloir plus
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Janvier 2009, un homme richissime, célèbre, paouerfoule, et tout ça, rencontre un génie (le genre de génie qui sort d’un jar quand on le frotte). Alors, le génie lui propose de faire des (non pas un mais des) voeux.
- Alors mon ami, tu veux plus de quoi pour cette nouvelle année 2009? Plus d’argent? Plus de pouvoir? Plus de sexe? Plus de santé? Réponds-moi, ne réfléchis pas trop longtemps et ne demandes pas trop de choses, c’est un conseil.
- OK, je veux plus d’entreprises, je veux plus de pouvoir, je veux plus d’amis fidèles, je veux plus de vacances pour faire le tour de mon pays.
Il a un peu hésité pour demander plus de sexe et plus de santé, mais finalement, il a suivi les conseils du génie et s’en est resté à ces quatre voeux, pensant que de toute manière, il aura assez de sexe et de santé, surtout s’il aura ces quatre premiers voeux exaucés.
- Bon, répond le génie, il me faudra jusqu’à 2 à 3 mois pour exaucer tout ça, mais je te promets qu’ils seront exaucés d’ici fin mars.
Et voilà notre génie (le genre de génie qui sort d’un jar quand on le frotte et qui exauce les voeux), qui écrit son rapport: Un homme richissime, célèbre, paouerfoule, et tout ça, qui ne veut plus d’entreprises, il ne veut plus de pouvoir, il ne veut plus d’amis fidèle, il ne veut plus de vacances pour faire le tour de son pays. Pour exaucer ses voeux, je vais faire en sorte que soient pillées, brûlées et détruites ses entreprises, et ce qu’il en reste sera donné à son rival. Il n’aura plus de pouvoir comme il le souhaitait: il sera viré de son travail et expulsé de son pays et ne pourra plus y revenir cette année. Ses amis se tourneront contre lui, même parmi ses nouveaux amis iront faire la pêche au lieu de l’aider, et ses soi-disant amis fidèles ne le soutiendront que pour mieux l’écraser.
Janvier 2010, constatant l’arnaque du génie quand il lisait un blog hostile, il se consola ainsi :
- Si je jouais au Roi Solomon et demandait “plus de sagesse”, j’aurais été dans un asile de fou, genre Anjanamasina à l’heure qu’il est. Si j’avais dit “plus de liberté, ce serait la prison, genre Guantanamo ou Tsiafahy. Si j’ai dit “plus de santé”, j’aurais été un végétal dans un hôpital en piteux état, genre HJRA. Et pire que tout : si j’avais dit “plus de sexe”, des milices auraient sectionné mon organe génital ou bien mon pénis serait resté dans un verre, dans une maison au fin fond du sud de mon pays…